Once, when I was a child, I was giving Sammy, my family’s Yorkshire Terrier, a bath. His hair was long. I thought it would be a good idea to give him a trim. To my recollection, I don’t think I did a terrible job overall, but my mother literally tackled me when she saw the “Fu Manchu” cut I gave him. Yes, I left my family pet with a long, wispy mustache–but for good reason. I didn’t want to hurt him. I knew that cats’ whiskers are sensory apparatus, and I figured my dog’s were the same–and to me, as a child, sensory would naturally equal sensitive, right?
Anyway, one day a few years ago as I was lying in bed with nerve pain and fatigue, my hair having grown longer (for me) than usual, and I was feeling a little extra…thoughtful. More in tuned with the universe, let’s say–and no, no drugs were involved. And I had been reading about nerves and neurology and in my mind’s eye saw the brain as an electrical generator, full of current. Could it be a coincidence that hair, which sits atop the brain, collects static? What if it has something to do with actual thought, I wondered, or at least with perceptions? So I let my mind wander, as I’m wont to do, and I also did a little reading. This is what I came up with at the time.
Now, listen, this is some interesting stuff. Somebody who can focus on one thing at a time really should look into it.
Either way, hair is something special. Growing like a thicket of lavender atop someone’s head, it makes that person look youthful, full of vital energy. Thinning, sparsely planted, or barren-headed, the same person’s face will look entirely different without hair.
Is there anything more beautiful than amber waves of hair caught in a breeze?
Is there anything more repulsive than a single strand of hair, curled and slimed to your Applebee’s platter of ribs?
PS: Did you catch that the image here is Kit HAIRington? And people say I’m not funny.